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Monodactyl
16th August 2004, 13:32
How much of the 'real you' are you comfortable sharing on the Net? Do you feel that hiding one's personal details - name, occupation, marital status, home town etc. - is a sensible precaution, or a sign of paranoia?

Would you post pictures of yourself and, if so, would you also feel comfortable posting pictures of your family?

Are you more open about your life in some places than in others? Do you quickly feel you 'know' someone after exchanging emails/talking via messenger program, and let your guard down more with them?

MissMarbles
16th August 2004, 15:31
I am pretty much who I am online as I am off. I dont see why people hide behind a different persona on the net....well, I do sort of. it's the lies that some people tell that really gets to me and believe me, I have been stung a few times. Thing is..what goes around comes around and if you tell lies, you'll get found out in the end innit.

I dont let my guard down and although I do have a couple of good friends online, I am still wary about what I tell them. I think if you open your heart, you're gonna get hurt.

No, I have never posted pics of myself either and I wouldnt. Not that I'm a minger you understand..O no. I'm gorgeous :yup2: v:2

Miss X

LadyLush
16th August 2004, 16:11
I don't know, i'm very shy in real life and would ahve to know someone very well to talk to them face to face the way i talk to some of you. I don't see the point in lying about who you are, if you want anything you say to carry any meaning atall then you don't lie about something like that, at the end of the day you are who you are anyway regardless of how many lies you tell about it.

I'm happy to post pictures of myself (as you know), I don't post pictures of my family unless i know whos looking at them. I suppose you do get to know someone to some extent by talking to them on the net, any of you could say you knew me because of the things i've told you, you probably know more about me than some of the people i know irl, its just that you haven't met me.

Sara xxxx

Monodactyl
16th August 2004, 16:45
Yes, in certain respects the anonymity of the Net lets you say things you wouldn't in real-life social situations; it's the same thing as telling your problems to a counsellor or Agony Aunt.

By the same token, that anonymity/remoteness could be used by some to be malicious. We see people being abusive on here, which probably doesn't bother anyone over-much because it generally isn't really personal.... but it could be if they had access to people's personal circumstances, and would be particularly unpleasant if it were directed at your wife/children etc. rather than at you.

I was very wary of the Net when I first came Online, just over two years ago, as I didn't know much about it or what information could be available with the right details. I decided from the off not to reveal any of my present circumstances, and signed up to things using assumed names, so I couldn't be traced. Now I'm more familiar with it I'm a bit more relaxed about what I'll tell people, but there's still only one person I've met online who does know anything about me - other than general background stuff - and I only opened up after I had physically met them.

I'm not worried about people getting into my bank accounts or anything like that, or that I'll be murdered by a deranged stalker, but there are a lot of weirdos around and it would be easy for them to be a major nuisance through phone calls, letters to your employers and, more worryingly, your family.
I've posted pics of myself, and (un-named) family members, because they would only recognise me from that if they knew me anyway. I've never given out my home phone number, and only given my mobile no. to a couple of people I had communicated regularly with via email first.

I tend to not say anything at all rather than lie about things... but I have been guilty of misleading ( :g3 ) people a little, if I felt they were 'pushing' for info.

Chris Mitchell
16th August 2004, 17:56
I feel fairly comfortable - I post in my own name, have met various people from various forums in real life, and post pictures. I suppose the problem is that if someone does have it in for you, they may be able to attack you anonymously - and if they know your home address or phone number, that could present a problem.

LadyLush
16th August 2004, 18:49
I don't give out my address or phone number to anyone, thats just asking for trouble in my opinion. I've never met anyone i've spoken to on the net either.

Sara xxx

Chris Mitchell
16th August 2004, 19:01
I don't give out my address or home phone number, but it wouldn't exactly take a genius to find it out. Most people here know which city I live in, and I post under my real name.

LadyLush
16th August 2004, 19:07
Everyone knows the city i live in too, but i don't tell anyone my surname, I don't want any stalkers.

Sara xxx

Scrotnig
16th August 2004, 19:16
520168 In Post 520168, Monodactyl said:
How much of the 'real you' are you comfortable sharing on the Net? Do you feel that hiding one's personal details - name, occupation, marital status, home town etc. - is a sensible precaution, or a sign of paranoia?

Would you post pictures of yourself and, if so, would you also feel comfortable posting pictures of your family?

Are you more open about your life in some places than in others? Do you quickly feel you 'know' someone after exchanging emails/talking via messenger program, and let your guard down more with them?
Just about everything about me is already known.

The bits I didn't reveal by choice, such as my home address and phone number, and place of work, were very kindly 'revealed' for me by certain people on other forums.

Katitude
16th August 2004, 19:20
In Post 520168, Monodactyl said:
How much of the 'real you' are you comfortable sharing on the Net? Do you feel that hiding one's personal details - name, occupation, marital status, home town etc. - is a sensible precaution, or a sign of paranoia?

I feel comfortable revealing certain information about myself such as first name, (though not surname), age, marital status, occupation and location, (but not 'exact' location of course), although a lot of people online I've noticed, (I've been around for 5 years), do not share these details.

Things such as 'exact' location, home address, telephone/mobile nos, I would not reveal.

Would you post pictures of yourself and, if so, would you also feel comfortable posting pictures of your family?

Yes I would feel comfortable posting pictures of myself and my family, I have done so before to close friends online. However and after posting them, I usually quickly remove them again, incase some psychopath happens to come across them and use them for some sick purpose. That has happened a lot I believe.

Are you more open about your life in some places than in others? Do you quickly feel you 'know' someone after exchanging emails/talking via messenger program, and let your guard down more with them?
[/B]

I never let my guard down while online. At the end of the day we can never be 100% sure of who we are talking to out there in cyber space.

LadyLush
16th August 2004, 19:27
520218 In Post 520218, Mark.B said:
Just about everything about me is already known.

The bits I didn't reveal by choice, such as my home address and phone number, and place of work, were very kindly 'revealed' for me by certain people on other forums.

Sadly its all too easy to find out whatever you want about someone using the internet. This is why i don't like to tell anyone my surname or anything like that i'd hate for someone weird to find out when i live.

Sara xxx

Katitude
16th August 2004, 19:36
520223 In Post 520223, LadyLush said:
Sadly its all too easy to find out whatever you want about someone using the internet. This is why i don't like to tell anyone my surname or anything like that i'd hate for someone weird to find out when i live.

Sara xxx


It isn't easy for people to find out 'exactly' who you are Lush, not unless you have given such things as your full name, your home address and exact location to others, which Mark probably did if he was friends with these people at one time.

It would take a hacker to hack into your computer to obtain information about you. People who merely surf the web have no way of finding out anything about you. They only know what you have chosen to reveal.

Try installing a good firewall such as ZoneAlarm Pro if you are worried about hackers. With Zonealarm Pro you can protect your name, address, bank details, pin numbers and such, so that if anyone did succeed in gaining entry to your computer, they wouldn't find a thing about you.

LadyLush
16th August 2004, 19:40
I've got the full McAfee package, and if you know where to look its really easy to find out everythign about someone just from knowing their first and last names, you can find out everything from where they live to the last time they applied for credit.

Sara xxxx

Monodactyl
16th August 2004, 20:19
520218 In Post 520218, Mark.B said:
Just about everything about me is already known.

The bits I didn't reveal by choice, such as my home address and phone number, and place of work, were very kindly 'revealed' for me by certain people on other forums.
Yes, some of your experiences are precisely what can happen when an unhinged stalker takes an interest in you. :(

I suppose, in the end, you had no choice but to take Sphinx on as a moderator... just so she'd leave you alone. :q3

Chris Mitchell
16th August 2004, 20:34
520223 In Post 520223, LadyLush said:
Sadly its all too easy to find out whatever you want about someone using the internet. This is why i don't like to tell anyone my surname or anything like that i'd hate for someone weird to find out when i live.

Sara xxx

So your surname *isn't* Lush, then? Damn!!:o

Katitude
16th August 2004, 20:59
520225 In Post 520225, LadyLush said:
I've got the full McAfee package, and if you know where to look its really easy to find out everythign about someone just from knowing their first and last names, you can find out everything from where they live to the last time they applied for credit.

Sara xxxx


Change it and get something more secure then :rofl3:

With Zonealarm Pro you can choose to encrypt all of your personal information, so that it appears as gobble dee gook to a hacker.

Not only that, but Zonealarm also lets you know if someone is trying to gain access to your computer and their IP along with it!

LadyLush
16th August 2004, 22:07
520248 In Post 520248, Chris Mitchell said:
So your surname *isn't* Lush, then? Damn!!:o

LOL no Lush was on a carrier bag when i had to pick a name :D

Sara xxx

LadyLush
16th August 2004, 22:10
520256 In Post 520256, Katitude said:
Change it and get something more secure then :rofl3:

With Zonealarm Pro you can choose to encrypt all of your personal information, so that it appears as gobble dee gook to a hacker.

Not only that, but Zonealarm also lets you know if someone is trying to gain access to your computer and their IP along with it!

I had zone alarm for ages then i upgraded it to zone alarm pro, compared to McAfee (which my lovely brother gave me) its rubbish. You can get the ip of anyone trying to access the ports on your puter with Mcafee too, sadly i sit and ping them over and over again, its no life really it isn't.

Sara xxx

Chris Mitchell
16th August 2004, 22:13
520275 In Post 520275, LadyLush said:
LOL no Lush was on a carrier bag when i had to pick a name :D

Sara xxx

Ah, *that's* where you got it from. And there's me thinking it was your fondness for alcohol :rofl:

Well, if you shop at Lush, you obviously smell nice s:13

LadyLush
16th August 2004, 22:25
I smell lovely Chris, Lush is my fave shop i spend a fortune in there. Gay blokes are so cool, i can't talk about Lush with any of the blokes i know.

Sara xxx

The Teacher
17th August 2004, 00:41
I have no problem in mentioning my home town, my occupation, my age or the fact that I am married.

The kids in the avatar are mine and the wife's, but I would not give my first name, surname or area of town where I live, nor the school that I teach in.

WRT to Zone Alarm and Macafee; I wouldn't have Macafee if it was given to me. I have always used Zone Alarm Pro, and in conjunction with a few pieces of software I have no problems. I have never had a virus. There is a site, I cannot remember the address, that scans your PC and then gives you a security report. According to that my PC doesn't exist. My neighbour, who had Macafee changed sharpish to Zone Alarm after visiting the site.

The Teacher

Scrotnig
17th August 2004, 00:45
The site in question is SHIELDS UP (https://grc.com/x/ne.dll?bh0bkyd2).

Also worth a visit is the excellent online virus scan called HOUSECALL (http://housecall.antivirus.com).

Katitude
17th August 2004, 01:37
I wouldn't have Macafee if it was given to me.

Me neither. I've heard it's rubbish,

It did me a huge favour, (b4 I heard it was rubbish), when for some reason or other, it refused to even install on my computer. x:3

I have Norton Anti Virus 2004 and the Zonealarm Pro as I mentioned. I've never had any viruses, no hack attacks, no nothing :)

The Teacher
18th August 2004, 02:29
I have as you do Kat, with Mailwasher to bounce back the spam, and I use pop up stopper, adaware and spybot search and destroy to make sure I don't pick up rubbish when visiting a site.

There is a piece of software also that runs in the background, that runs in conjunction with Zone Alarm and allows you to ping back those making hack attempts. It also has a whois feature and a report abuse feature. It is free. I will post up the website when I find it. I have it set to come at start up so I don't look at it much.

The Teacher

River Poison
18th August 2004, 03:00
I just treat everyone I meet like a stranger - I mean, I wouldn't go round giving out phone numbers to strangers I'd just met (unless, perhaps, she was very fit ;-))

Monodactyl
18th August 2004, 13:21
520804 In Post 520804, River Poison said:
I just treat everyone I meet like a stranger - I mean, I wouldn't go round giving out phone numbers to strangers I'd just met (unless, perhaps, she was very fit ;-))
And didn't your mummy warn you of strangers offering you ice-cream?? :yup:

River Poison
18th August 2004, 18:56
Strangely not :-|

Katitude
18th August 2004, 19:08
520800 In Post 520800, The Teacher said:
I have as you do Kat, with Mailwasher to bounce back the spam, and I use pop up stopper, adaware and spybot search and destroy to make sure I don't pick up rubbish when visiting a site.

There is a piece of software also that runs in the background, that runs in conjunction with Zone Alarm and allows you to ping back those making hack attempts. It also has a whois feature and a report abuse feature. It is free. I will post up the website when I find it. I have it set to come at start up so I don't look at it much.

The Teacher


I used to use Adaware too on the other computer I had. That is ideal for removing those folders full of spyware that are being planted in our computers unbeknown to us and while we surf. I once had 22 folders full of rubbish, most of it was Cydoor spyware and Gator.

The software that you can use alongside Zonealarm sounds good though, so when you find the url please do send it across :)

kneebs76
18th August 2004, 23:39
I'm more than happy giving out my age, town where I live, and first name. My name on most forums is what I get called in 'real' life by my mates (well, minus the 76), and comes from my surname. I'm quite happy to tell people what I do for a living, and the type of organisation I work for, just not who, unless I've been speaking to them for a while, and would only do that by private chat / IM. I'm prepared to post pics of me good self (not that anyone would really be bothered like, its not as if I'm sex on legs or owt), but wouldn't post pics of family members.

I've never met anyone that I know only from t'internet, and would only do so after talking regually for a long while. There's few people I talk to regulally via messenger / chat that I've spoken to only online, so its not really an issue anyway

Katitude
18th August 2004, 23:53
521043 In Post 521043, kneebs76 said:

I'm prepared to post pics of me good self (not that anyone would really be bothered like, its not as if I'm sex on legs or owt),




And here's me thinking that your avatar was your real pic :blank:

Shame, I thought ya looked quite sexy and manly in that red cape :rofl3:

River Poison
19th August 2004, 00:39
Superted's ace :D

kneebs76
19th August 2004, 00:48
521056 In Post 521056, Katitude said:
And here's me thinking that your avatar was your real pic :blank:

Shame, I thought ya looked quite sexy and manly in that red cape :rofl3:


Ah, you see that is me, in my super hero guise !!! :rofl:

The Teacher
19th August 2004, 01:41
The programme you want, to run in conjunction with Zone Alarm, is VisualZone and can be found at the following place.

www.visualizesoftware.com

The Teacher

Nimuae
20th August 2004, 12:34
Most of you who have read my posts/poems etc have seen my picture, but I would not post my families pictures - unless they asked me to - or, as LadyLush wisely said, unless I knew who was viewing them, and then I would delete them again for safety. I have revealed my real name to those of you whom I have met - but was stilled referred to as Nimuae or Nim anyway - so I don't think it matters. I only tell people as much as I want them to know - that goes for real life (whatever that is) as well, but I never lie. If someone is interested enough to ask me a question then I believe that he/she is entitled to an honest answer. I would never give my address or telephone number to anyone that I not met.

I think the internet and these fora are fun. It is good to see/hear others opinions - I feel I have learned a lot from my participation here, and have a great deal of respect for the contributors - even those that I do not always agree with. I consider that I have some really good friends here.